Chobits
by narashadow
Summary: This story was made after watching Chobits. It's sort of a cross over, but Naruto centric. Main character's Shikamaru. Takes place in shippuuden series. Rated T for language and nudity. Don't blame me.
1. Chi

This story was made after watching Chobits. It is sort of a cross-over, but it is mainly centered in the Naruto world. Please review this story if you like it, and please no flames. This is my third story. Ok, enough chit chat, onto the story!  
- 

It was one of those days again. Shikamaru was walking home after his about 100th mission, bored and tired, but it was also one of those days when he was just a little bit less lazy, only a little, so he decided to take the long way home. He took a left into an alley, full of trash cans and trash bags full of trash. Why he decided to take the long way through the alley he'll never know. Shikamaru sighed and said, "It's times like these that I wish I could cook." Ever since he got kicked out of his parents house to, what his mom said, push him to get a girl friend, get married, and have lots of grandchildren so at least one wouldn't have, what his mom referred it as, the lazy gene. He shuddered at the thought of having kids especially lots of them. Now, he lived in an apartment on the other side of the village which made him rethink his idea of taking the long way there more. Ever since he got kicked out he wished he could cook so he didn't have to go take out. Suddenly, a sound of a few bottles breaking was heard behind a dumpster which made him jump. Suddenly, a cat jumped out and scratched his face with four claws making him fall into a trash can behind him. "Crap! Stupid cat!" he screamed getting out of the trash can. "What's on my butt?" Shikamaru turned his head to see egg shells and spoiled milk on his butt. "Awwwwww, crap. This day sucks"  
-

After Shikamaru finally got to his apartment, he had a gut feeling something was wrong. After getting to the door that read "Shikamaru Nara" on a small wooden plate hung on the door, he found out why he had the gut feeling. His keys were missing. "Awwwww, crap," he said quietly so his neighbors wouldn't wake up since it was about eight o clock, and his neighbors were just as lazy as he was. Shikamaru closed his eyes to think where his keys might be. His eyes shot open, and he knew where the keys were, the trash can. He sighed and rushed back down the two flights of stairs only to be greeted by falling rain. "Awwwwww, come on"  
-

After rushing through the rain to the trash can that made his pants smell like crap, Shikamaru dug through the trash and said to himself, "Geez, don't these people put this stuff in trash bags?" He finally found the keys under the milk carton that had the spoiled milk, and he saw something about it. It expired a month ago! His mouth shot open. "Holy shit!" he yelled. He almost cried at the thought of having pants that smelled of eggs and month old milk, but he just sighed and turned around to leave with his keys to his apartment.  
-

It was morning again, but Shikamaru had a bad feeling about today. When he got up he knew why. He fell asleep on the kitchen table! "I hate my life," he said pushing himself off of the table. After getting off the table, his feeling took a 180 degree turn which, if your not stupid, means he had a good feeling about today. After changing from his pajamas into his normal ninja clothes, Shikamaru walked out of his apartment only to be greeted by a very annoying Ino.

"Yo, Shikamaru!" she yelled as Chouji and her ran up the stairs to him.

"Ready to train?" Chouji asked already knowing the answer.

"Nope," Shikamaru answered knowing both Ino and him knew he was going to say that.

"Come on, Shikamaru!" Ino yelled pouting and crossing her arms. Shikamaru just shrugged.

"Look I had a bad day yesterday so just let me rest today," he said not moved at all at Ino's pouting. Ino just sighed and shook her head.

"Ok, but only because you said you had a bad day," she said as she stopped shaking her head. "Come on, Chouji. I know you don't have any plans so no excuses!" she yelled as she dragged him down the stairs and to the training grounds. Shikamaru shook his head at how easily they were tricked. If he was walking out of his apartment wouldn't that mean he's not resting? He swore to himself that they should work on their brains instead of their bodies. Shikamaru shrugged and walked down the stairs to go cloud watching. Again he would have to go through the alley to get to his favorite cloud watching spot since it's the shortest way. He sighed and left the apartment.  
-

So far nothing bad happened, but he was still alert on going through the alley. Shikamaru's eyes never blinked and kept shifting side to side. "I just know something's going to happen, but what?" he asked himself as he was half way through. Again he heard a sound of a few bottles breaking, and he immediately got two kunais out and waited. After a good minute, he confirmed the cat would not strike. Right when he lowered his kunais, he thought again. Four claw marks appeared on the other side of his face. "Owww! You damn cat!" he screamed as he dropped his kunais and fell onto a few trash bags. Shikamaru's head hit something hard, and as he looked up he saw something that made his eyes and mouth go wide. It was a leg! Shikamaru hurried and lifted two trash bags to reveal a near naked girl about his age. Shikamaru suddenly had a nose bleed and almost fainted. "Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god. What do I do?" He asked himself pacing back and forth. "Well I can't take her to the hospital or people will see me so I'll have to take her to my apartment." After he decided what to do, he picked her up bridal style, and almost fell over at how heavy she was.  
-

Shikamaru was in his kitchen with the girl on the table. She only had a long cloth wrapped around her sort of like Kurenia. She had long blond hair and perfect colored skin, but for some reason she had two red and white pod things covering her ears. He slowly reached for the one on the right side of her face. As he touched it he found the red part felt like plastic and was a little see through while the white part, which was below the red part, felt a little like metal but was not see through at all. Shikamaru's eyes suddenly wondered down the girls body, but he stopped himself by slapping his right cheek. "Come on, Shikamaru! You're not a pervert!" he thought to himself as he looked away, but there was something about the ear things on the girls ears that made him want to see if they open. Shikamaru again slowly reached and touched the right one again. He then touched where the red and white parts of the ear thing meet, and he slowly opened it. Inside were two of those things that you put into a T.V., but the weird thing was that they were coming out of her head, and she didn't have an ear! Shikamaru's mouth dropped open as he starred at the cable things, and suddenly the girl started to glow. "What the?!" Shikamaru asked himself. The girl then rose from the table and floated in midair. Slowly the cloth around her unwrapped, and Shikamaru got a nose bleed. His eyes and mouth widened, too, at the sight. "Oh. My. God," was all he could say as the girl's eyes opened slowly.

"Chi," she said as her feet lowered to the table, and she stood on it. Shikamaru just stared and stared until she spoke again, "Chi." It sounded more like she was asking a question then making a statement. Again Shikamaru got a nose bleed and almost fainted.

"Chi?" he said with confusion in his voice. The girl then suddenly smiled, and in a second jumped off the table and hugged Shikamaru giving him a monstrous nose bleed. He knew something was going to happen in that alley, but he didn't know it would be like this.  
-

So how do you like it? If you want to know what the girl looks like watch Chobits. She looks like Chi. Actually she isv Chi. You'll see what I mean. Well review, but no flames. I hate those. Well bye!


	2. Let The Games Begin!

This story will be updated daily so don't worry. I'm sorry if my grammar is bad. I can only do spell check, but not grammar check. Sorry for the inconvenience. Well lets start this story!  
- 

"Hey Ino! Chouji!" Naruto screamed running up to Chouji and Ino as they were heading back from training.

"Yo Naruto," Chouji said as Naruto stopped running in front of them.

"Where's Shikamaru?" Naruto asked raising an eyebrow.

"He said he had a bad day yesterday so he said he would stay in for the day. You know what? He was already outside his door when we got to his apartment," Ino said and put her hand on her chin to think.

"Maybe he's with that sand ninja girl. What was her name? Um..." Naruto also put his hand on his chin to think.

"No way! He's just her guide," Chouji proclaimed as Naruto, Ino, and him started walking in the direction Ino and him were walking originally.

"Suuure. Anyway, where could he be?" Naruto asked again.

"I bet he was cloud watching again. I swear he'll never find a girl if he keeps being so lazy," Ino exclaimed turning her head to look at Naruto. Chouji was to the left of Naruto while Ino was to the right of Naruto, and Naruto, of course, was in the middle.

"Yeah, I bet he went home to rest after he was done," Chouji said also turning his head to look at Naruto.

"Yeah," Naruto and Ino agreed.

"Lets go get him and everyone else, get Kakashi to buy us some sake, and have a big party!" Naruto screamed getting a big grin on his face at the thought of Sakura drunk.

"You know what? That's actually a good idea, Naruto! Lets go!" Ino said also grinning at the thought of a whole bunch of boys drunk, but her grin disappeared after remembering how Sasuke wouldn't be there.  
-

"This is going to be one youthful night!" Lee screamed as the Konaha 11 walked down the street.

"Yeah, Lee!" Naruto said while doing his famous grin.

"For the first time I agree," Sakura said turning her head to look at Naruto with a sweet smile on her face. "But if you try anything while I'm drunk, Naruto, you won't see the light of tomorrow!" Sakura said turning her smile into an evil stare.

"Yeah, yeah, Sakura, I know," Naruto said turning his head back to its original position to hide his scared face.

"I'm actually excited about this party, too," Neji said giving a small grin.

"That's the spirit, my fateful companion!" Lee yelled raising his arm. "Also Sakura didn't threaten me if I do anything," Lee whispered giving the nice guy pose to himself.

"Oh yeah Lee if you do anything I'll kill you, too!" Sakura said giving Lee the death stare, too. Lee just groaned.

"Ok, ok, Sakura," Lee said groaning again.

"I'm the most excited about this party since I suggested it!" Naruto yelled grinning for the 100th time.

"T-t-that's g-good, Naruto," Hinata said stuttering. Suddenly a puff of smoke appeared.

"Yo," Kakashi greeted reading his book.

"Oh, Kakashi!" Naruto yelled. "We need you to buy us some sake for a party!" Naruto yelled at the thought of sake.

"Ok, but what do I get in return?" Kakashi asked lowering his book to look at the Konaha 11. Naruto grinned again and pulled out a green book. Kakashi's eye widened. "This is... Make-Out Tactics volume 2!" Kakashi took it quickly and began reading. "Ok, you win. How much you want?" Kakashi asked not looking up from the book.

"Thirty bottles should do," Naruto said handing Kakashi a wad of money. "You get the sake and meet us at Shikamaru's place. If we're going to go get him we might as well have the party at his apartment," Naruto said as Kakashi took off to fulfill Naruto's request.

"G-good idea, N-naruto," Hinata said stuttering again.

"Who knows? Maybe Shikamaru got a girlfriend," Naruto said getting a sly smile on his face.

"I bet not," Ino said sighing.

"Hey that's a good idea! Lets play strip poker!" Naruto yelled getting a bigger smile at the thought of Sakura in her under garments. Hinata blushed at the thought of Naruto down to his boxers.

"Naruto!!!" Sakura yelled knocking Naruto a good ten yards away. "I'm good with spin the bottle, but no strip poker!" Almost every guy there snapped their fingers in disappointment, and Sakura sighed. Five minutes later, they reached Shikamaru's apartment, and kakashi was waiting, about fifteen bags behind him. He looked up from his book to look at the group as they approached, but little did they know that this was happening the moment the near naked girl opened her eyes.

"Well, my job is done here," Kakashi said about to take off, but a scream from the third floor of the apartment stopped him.

"What was that?!" asked Chouji knowing it came from the floor Shikamaru was on.

"I don't know. Lets go!" Ino yelled and they jumped up to the second floor and then to the third. The group ran to the first door they saw which held a small wooden plate that read "Shikamaru Nara". They got ready to barge in, but they heard a muffled voice.

"Crap! Everyone's here! Quick hide!" one voice said.

"Chi." The Konaha 11 and Kakashi could barely make out what the second voice said.

"Quick in the closet!" the first voice said, and then the group on the outside of the door heard a few noises of pushing. Suddenly, the door opened. "Hi, everyone!" Shikamaru said a fake smile on his face.

"Yo, Shikamaru, what was all that noise we heard?" Naruto asked after greeting Shikamaru. Shikamaru's face was sweating bullets after the question.

"Uh, it was... um... mice?" he said trying to keep his smile.

"Hm, I bet you got a girlfriend!" Naruto yelled getting a bigger grin.

"What?! No way! I swear it was mice!" Shikamaru said losing his smile.

"Then why are you trying to fake a smile, and you have a nose bleed on your face," Naruto said getting a bigger smile. Shikamaru's mouth went wide.

"I... well uh," he said struggling to get the right words.

"Chi." Shikamaru's face went pale.

"What was that?" Ino asked looking past Shikamaru.

"N-nothing," he stuttered putting his arm in the way of Ino so she couldn't get into the apartment.

"What's wrong, Shikamaru? Is there something you don't want us to see?" Ino said feeling a smile coming on.

"No, nothing at all," he said still not moving.

"Then move, man! We have thirty bottles of sake to keep cool!" Naruto yelled pushing Shikamaru out of the way. He immediately stored the sake in the fridge which surprisingly fit since Shikamaru couldn't cook and was too lazy to go shopping. Shikamaru looked around to see if the girl was still there. "Ok, lets get this party started!" Naruto yelled.

"Yeah!" Lee yelled, too.

"Chi." The group heard the voice again.

"What was that?" Kiba said. He sniffed the air and said, "I smell something." He walked towards the closet in the kitchen that Shikamaru hid the girl in, and he stiffened. Shikamaru quickly got in the way.

"Don't go in there it's uh..." He struggled again to get the right words.

"Move aside," Kiba pushed passed him and reached for the door. Shikamaru was panicking now that Kiba's hand reached the door. Kiba slowly opened it to reveal... nothing. The girl was gone. "Huh? I guess you weren't lying, Shikamaru." Seriously these people need to work on their brains.

"Chi."

"Ok, what is that?!" Neji yelled getting annoyed.

"Nothing! Nothing at all!" Shikamaru said waving his arms. "Where is she?" he thought to himself as he walked towards his room. He hadn't slept all day, and boy was he tired.

"Chi." The voice came from behind the door, and Shikamaru froze.

"Hm, you here something?" Naruto asked looking up from the cup of sake he was about to drink. Shikamaru was sweating bullets again.

"Naruto! Why are you already drinking?!" Sakura yelled ready to hit him.

"Well, we need a bottle to play spin the bottle!" Naruto yelled putting his arms up in defense. Shikamaru would have to thank Sakura later. "Huh? Shikamaru, Why'd you stop?" So much for thanking her, but that wasn't important right now. He'll have to go to drastic measures so the rest of the Konaha 11 won't think he's a pervert. He'll have to play spin the bottle.

"N-no reason, but lets hurry up and play spin the bottle." Shikamaru said clapping his hands together.

"Right!" yelled Naruto who was on his third cup of sake.

"Well, I'll take my leave," Kakashi said and took off. Shikamaru felt more confident now that the smartest of the people he had to trick left.  
-

After everyone had about three cups of sake, the game of spin the bottle began. "Ok, here are the rules: 1. I'll spin first since I'm the prettiest," said Ino who was explaining the rules but had to dodge a kunai at the first one, but she continued, "2. Who ever it lands on get to choose between truth or dare. 3. If you choose truth you're a wuss, and I get to ask you a yes or no question and you have to answer it truthfully. 4. If you chose truth and answered I'll enter your mind to find out if you told the truth. 5. If you choose dare you're not a wuss, and you have to do what ever I say. 6. After that, you get to spin the bottle, and the cycle starts over. Ok, ready?" Everyone nodded to confirm they were ready, but Shikamaru had a gut feeling this would end badly.  
-

All I have to say is review, and what happened to the girl in Shikamaru's apartment? Find out in the next chapter as Shikamaru tries to get everyone to pass out and find a better place to hide the girl. Bye!


	3. Mission Get Everyone Drunk

From now on I'm going to put an omake on every chapter! For those of you who don't know what an omake is, it's a mini story at the beginning or end of a chapter that you can even put yourself in. Heck you can put other anime characters in if you want to. If you still don't get it watch Bleach. When it gets to like the 50th episode, it'll start having omakes at the end of every episode. Well, enough chit chat onto the story!  
- 

"Ok, time to spin!" Ino yelled as she spun the bottle, and it landed on... "Chouji! Truth or dare?" Ino asked as it landed on him.

"Well, since I'm not a wuss, I choose dare!" Chouji yelled looking triumphant.

"I dare you to chug a whole bottle of sake while I cover your nose, and if the bottle leaves your lips I get to spin again!" Ino yelled shattering Chouji's triumphant look, but he gestured for Naruto to get a bottle anyway. As he chugged Naruto held his nose, and, surprisingly, he chugged it in one minute.

"My turn," Chouji said as he took the bottle and spun it. After spinning for a minute do to Chouji being a little tipsy after chugging a whole bottle of sake and his amazing strength, the bottle landed on Shino. "Truth or dare, Shino?"

"Truth, I don't care if you think I'm a wuss," Shino said not scared at all if he's haunted the rest of his life for choosing truth.

"Did you-" Chouji was cut off as Naruto whispered something in his ear, and Chouji grinned and nodded. "Is it true on one of your missions you had to let Naruto take your place because you couldn't stop laughing?" Chouji asked getting his triumphant look back while Shino glared at Naruto.

"Ok, yes, but it was because of a laughing potion!" Shino finally admitted.

"I don't think I have to enter his mind if he said yes so your turn to spin, Shino," Ino said handing the bottle to him while he was still glaring at Naruto. Shino spun it anyway, and it landed on Lee.

"Lee, truth or dare?" Shino asked knowing he was going to choose dare.

"Dare, my youthful friend!" Lee yelled standing up with a glint in his teeth.

"What ever. I dare you to not say any word that contains the letter y for the rest of the game," Shino said which almost killed Lee.

"But wh-" Lee began, but Shino interrupted.

"Why has a y in it," he said grinning a little, but Lee just groaned and spun the bottle.

"Kiba uhhhh friend, truth or dare?" Lee said catching himself.

"Dare, man," Kiba said holding in some laughter.

"I dare-" Lee began again.

"You has a y," Shino said grinning again.

"Wh-" Lee began again, again.

"I told you why has a y," Shino said ginning from ear to ear.

"I dare Kiba to d-" Lee began again, again, again.

"Dye has a y," Shino said still grinning.

"How did y- I mean Shino know I was going to sa- I mean uhhh speak die," Lee said struggling to get the right words.

"Hm, good idea using die as in death instead of dye as in color dye," Neji said impressed a little.

"Thanks, my youthful companion!" Lee yelled giving the nice guy pose.

"You said two words that time! Bye!" Shino yelled sending bugs at Lee.

"Ahhhh!!! No bugs, please!" Lee yelled running away from the bugs.

"Ok, but I get to go again," Shino said ordering his bugs to return, and Lee just groaned again. Shino spun the bottle and it landed on Naruto. "Sweat, sweat revenge," Shino said grinning like mad again.

"Oh shit," Naruto said frowning.

"Truth or dare, soon to be dead Naruto?" Shino said looking like a graveyard keeper.

"I'm not afraid! Dare!" Naruto yelled raising his arm, but suddenly Chouji fainted do to chugging the humongous bottle of sake.

"Well that sucks. Anyway, I dare you to sit next to Hinata with your shirt off." Shino said which didn't frighten Naruto.

"That's it? That's all you got? Ok," Naruto walked over to Hinata while taking his shirt off and sat down next to her making Hinata blush. The seating arrangements are in a circle starting with Shikamaru, who is in front of his bedroom door, and going to the right are Shikamaru, Neji, Kiba, Ino, Sakura, Tenten, Lee, Hinata, and Naruto. Chouji isn't there because he fainted.

"My turn, my turn!" Naruto yelled as he spun the bottle, and it landed on Sakura. Naruto got an evil grin on his face and asked, " Truth or dare?"

"Truth," Sakura replied, but Ino tried to reassure her.

"Come on, Billboard Brow, choose dare!" Ino said making Sakura give her the death glare.

"Ok then, Ino-pig. Dare, Naruto." Sakura said turning her head to Naruto.

"I dare you to take off your-" Naruto was cut off by Sakura's fist knocking him into the sink.

"Pervert!" Sakura yelled. "Well, since Naruto's out cold, I'll spin," Sakura said and spun the bottle, and it landed on Shikamaru. "Truth or dare?" Sakura asked.

"If I choose truth they'll ask if there was a girl in my apartment so I have to choose dare," Shikamaru thought to himself and said, "Dare." Big mistake as Sakura got an evil grin.

"I dare you to open your bedroom door." Shikamaru froze. Right now he hated Sakura, but maybe the girl hid herself or something. He'll have to open the door anyway to avoid suspicion. So with that Shikamaru got up and walked over to his bedroom door. Everyone else got up, too, and fallowed. Shikamaru slowly reached for the doorknob, and as he turned it he closed his eyes. "Hm, I guess you weren't hiding anything," Sakura said, and Shikamaru opened his eyes to see that the girl was nowhere to be seen. He sighed, closed the door, and the group continued their game.  
-

After an hour, everyone except Shikamaru was on the ground out cold, and Shikamaru smiled. "Good now I'm in the clear," he said quietly so they wouldn't wake up. He walked over to his bedroom door and opened it. Shikamaru walked over to his bed and jumped onto the left side. "I'm glad that's over, but where's that girl?" he asked himself as he rolled onto his left side, but his question was answered immediately as she was sleeping right next to him. He tried to get up but found his body was too tired to get up. "This sucks. I'm in a bed with a naked girl with no ears," he suddenly got a nose bleed at that thought. "That came out wrong," he said to himself. "Well, since I can't move, I might as well-" he couldn't finish as he fell asleep next to the sleeping girl.  
-

Time for the omake!

Shikamaru: Well this is troublesome.

Chouji: I can't believe I chugged a whole- barf

Ino: Shikamaru you pervert! smack

Shikamaru: Ow! Ino, what was that for?

Temari: Hey, guys what's up?

Shikamaru: Holy shit! runs away

Temari: What was that about?

Ino: Nothing, nothing at all.

Temari: Ok, what ever. leaves

Ino: Well, see you next time! Bye!


	4. To The Docter!

Sorry I haven't updated for a while, but now I'm ready to catch up on this story. Before I begin, I want to ask for at least one review. If I get one review I'll keep going on this fic, but if I get none I'll delete it. So review now!  
-

"Uh, god. Where am I?" Shikamaru asked raising his head about 45 degrees, but he quickly remembered what happened last night: a naked girl was somewhere in his apartment, most of the Konaha 11 was in his apartment, and his apartment, for some reason, was a magnet for trouble. His eyes widened and he shot up the rest of the 90 degree angle he almost completed when he woke up. "Oh shit!" he shouted jumping out of bed still in his clothes and stinking of sake, and Shikamaru rushed into his kitchen to see everyone still out cold. "Phew. I have to get another apartment," he said as he walked back to his room, and, after he opened the door, he stopped in his tracks.

"Chi." The girl was there, and she smiled. Shikamaru's nose got a red trail of blood as his eyes traveled down to see her rather large assets. "Chi," she _chied_ again, but Shikamaru's eye just twitched. After a few seconds of a nose bleed, large eyes, a gaping mouth, and a naked girl standing in front of the man getting those very features, Shikamaru finally covered his eyes, turned his head, and thought why she wasn't reacting.

"P-please put some clothes on!" he shouted/ whispered so the other ninja, who were still out cold, wouldn't hear. Then he realized he brought her to his apartment without any clothes. "God damn it."

"Chi." Again she _chied_, but Shikamaru forgot what happened last time he copied her in a questioning tone.

"Chi?" Again she jumped and hugged him, and again he got a monstrous nose bleed. "G-get off!" This time he yelled. Big mistake.

"Wha? Where am I?" Shikamaru saw Ino wake up, but she was facing the wrong way. Shikamaru would have to thank god this time, but again he forgot what happened last time he thanked someone.

"Chi," the naked girl said still hugging Shikamaru.

"Huh?" Ino looked around, but never looked behind her, which was where Shikamaru and the mysterious girl were. Eventually, Ino said, "Damn rats." Thank you god. Again, big mistake. "Where's Shikamaru? Hm, I bet he's in his room." Shikamaru froze, and, again, damn you god. Ino slowly turned around, but Shikamaru reacted just in time as he got up, the naked girl still hugging him, walked two feet, and ran in the closet where the girl was supposed to have hidden. "Well, the door's open so he probably left. Lazy bastard, left all us out cold," Ino just sighed and stood up. "Well, I guess I'll do him a favor and get everyone out of here." Shikamaru was secretly watching Ino as she picked everyone up easily, and he released a longly held breath. Finally, Ino left with everyone.

"Phew. Finally," Shikamaru said walking out of the closet, but he soon noticed the girl still hugging him and worse the mess of a sake party. He got another nose bleed, fell over, and died. Not really.  
-

"Chi." Shikamau was aroused as a voice spoke, and again he shot up at the sudden memory of who the voice belonged to. Then he remembered the Konaha 11 was gone, and he had nothing to worry about. Again he was wrong because the girl was still, STILL hugging him.

"W-what are you doing!" he asked/ shouted.

"Chi!" she screamed and pushed her body against him.

"Whoa! D-don't do that!" he ordered, and she got off. The look in her eye showed Shikamaru that she was disappointed. "Ok, you can hug me if you get some clothes on."

The girl perked up and shouted, "Chi!" raising her arms making her assets look even larger giving Shikamaru a nose bleed.  
-

After many minutes of searching and struggling to get clothes on, Shikamaru got clothes that fit her, but they looked exactly like his. "Ok, if no one sees you it'll be ok," Shikamaru said knowing someone would walk up to him and shake his hand, saying, "Congratulations." "Well lets go," Shikamaru said looking at the girl, but he noticed the same disappointing look she had earlier. "Fine, you can hug me," he conceded.

"Chi!" she yelled jumping and hugging him.

"Why do you always say chi?" Shikamaru asked but regretted it as she squished him tighter. This time he had a small nose bleed. "L-lets g-go"  
-

"I hate my life, I hate my life, I hate my life," Shikamaru repeated over an over.

"Chi," The now dressed girl said looking concerned for him.

"I'm ok. I think." He whispered the last part so the girl wouldn't hear.

As they entered a hospital a man looked up from his paperwork and said, "Don't tell me your here for a pregnant test." At that statement Shikamaru's eyes widened.

"Oh, she's not my-" Shikamaru couldn't finish as the man interrupted.

"Ok, ok. I just needed to know if you were here for that. What do you need?" he asked releasing a breath to show he was relieved.

"I found this girl in an alley under some trash bags-" Again he was interrupted.

"Trash bags! Who put her there?" the man asked, but he was an idiot for it since Shikamaru obviously didn't know.

"I don't know, but I took her home because she was... er... half... naked, but I got some clothes on her. She doesn't seem to have any injuries, but I think something's the matter with her voice because she can only say chi." As Shikamaru finished, the girl instantly hugged him. "Ah! Not again!" He struggled against her, but her grip was like steel. "Can you just ugh check her," Shikamaru said struggling took get the right words instead of the girl.

"Yeah, right away." The man pushed a button and two other men came in, took the girl off of Shikamaru, and walked through a door with her.

"Ok, I can go now, right?" Shikamaru asked stepping back, eager to leave.

"Oh no, you have to fill out a form," the man at the desk said, which disappointed Shikamaru, but he just sighed.

"Ok, whatever," Shikamaru said groaning. "But don't tell anyone about this."

"Yeah, yeah whatever," the man said going back to his paperwork, after handing one paper to Shikamaru.  
-

Omake!

Shikamaru: Phew, thank god I- Crap! I said thank god! panics

Ino: Hi, Shika! what happened this chapter? enters

Shikamaru: N-nothing! cowers in fear

Ino: Let me see. starts reading

Shikamaru: Wait! Ino! cowers more in fear

Ino: Shikamaru! Why did you hug a naked girl! stops reading

Shikamaru: I didn't mean it! cowers even more in fear

Temari: Hi, Shikamaru! What happened this chapter? enters

Shikamaru: Damn you, god! dies (really this time)  
-

Just so you know I don't believe in god. Also remember, one review for the next chapter. Please, I'm begging you! Well, bye!


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